A Baby Boy & a Father's Love
Happy 16th Birthday Braxton!! It’s really hard to believe that 16yrs ago
today our first son was born; we are so proud of him and love him with all of
our hearts. What an amazing gift from God! When I was thinking about Braxton’s
upcoming birthday I couldn’t help being reminded that his birth and existence
was one of the most pivotal points in my life.
You see when he was born, I wouldn’t have considered myself a Christian
at that point. I really didn’t believe in God.
Looking back now on my earlier life I could honestly say there were
times I thought “maybe” but verbally I had more of a “scientific, I need proof”
mindset. It’s funny how God reveals Himself to us, some of us know Him all of
our lives, others have our eyes opened by friends/family/church and then there
are us who God speaks through in unconventional means…
I don’t know about all men but I’m pretty comfortable saying
that most of us are pretty clueless on what’s about to happen when our wives
are pregnant. You see, a woman carries
the baby, the whole time having that constant connection, that relationship
with their child…she “knows” her baby.
Us guys (at least I was ) are like “yep, we’re having a baby,
that’s cool huh?” Yes, I knew Carrie was
pregnant, I felt the kicks in her tummy, I witnessed the morning sickness, the
birthing classes with the hippie lady, but I didn’t “really” know what was
about to happen.
On Dec 4, 1997 Braxton Ayers Todd was born at Mac Dill Air
Force Base in Tampa Florida and I got to meet him for the very first time. I was overwhelmed, here is this little baby
that I never met and I loved him more than words can explain and I loved him
instantly and unconditionally. I didn’t
understand how that was possible, but it over took me.
As a little time went by and we settled into being parents I
came home from work one day and Carrie handed me Braxton. Like most nights he just laid on me and slept
as I watched TV or a movie but this time it happened to be the movie
“Contact”. I don’t remember much about
the movie except Jodie Foster is a scientist and her father had recently passed
and that her father was trying to develop a machine that reached heaven? Matthew
McCaughey was a Preacher that played opposite Jodie. As I was watching the movie with baby Braxton
sleeping on me, a scene came on where Jodie and Matthew were on a balcony
discussing the existence of God. Jodie
said that she believed God was made up by man so we wouldn’t feel all alone and
if there was an all-powerful God why didn’t he leave any proof? Then Matthew
said he couldn’t imagine living in a world without God, she replied how can you
be so sure & since she was a scientist she needed proof. After a pause, Matthew asked her “Do you love
your Father?” she was caught off guard
and said “what?”, he then again asked
her “do you love your Father?” Then
Jodie very strongly and heartfelt said “yes, very much so” he then replied
“prove it.” That two word statement
from Matthew just turned my world upside down.
Here I was, laying here with my son, whom I loved more than words can
explain and I couldn’t prove it. The
most powerful, sure, true thing that I had ever known and it was basically
unprovable. This was when my relationship with God began, of course He always
had a relationship with me, I was just to blind to see. I used to say “show me
a miracle…part the sea, etc”, now I see
God’s existence in everything, there are miracles literally happening all the
time just so we can continue to breath.
I am so thankful that 16yrs ago today that God gave my wife
and I our baby boy, he is now growing into an incredible young man, we are so very proud of you Braxton! I can't wait to see all of the things God has planned for you!
God Bless!
Barrett
